Vidaai is the bride's farewell to her family at the end of a Hindu wedding. After the ceremony and the blessings, she says goodbye to her parents and relatives and leaves with her husband for her new home. For many families it is the moment the day turns from celebration to tears.
In Hindi it is written विदाई, meaning farewell. Say it "vi-DAA-ee".
Which traditions use it
Vidaai is a Hindu custom, strongest in North Indian families, and it is cultural rather than a required rite. The Hindu American Foundation lists kanya vidai at the end of the ceremony and calls it "optional and up to the discretion of the bride and her family".
The same moment appears across traditions:
- Muslim weddings: the rukhsati.
- Sikh and Punjabi weddings: the doli. The Apna Virsa heritage project describes the couple leaving in a decorated car while the bride's brothers push it "as long as they can".
When it happens
At the very end of the wedding day, after the ceremony, the meal and the blessings. In some families the bride throws handfuls of rice back over her head as she leaves, as a wish that her parents' home stays prosperous. Customs vary by region and family.
In the UK, where the ceremony and reception are often at a venue rather than the family home, the vidaai usually happens at the venue door or the car.
Vendors involved
- Venue: agree the finish time and where the car can wait.
- Photographer and videographer: make sure they stay until the car leaves. The vidaai produces some of the most treasured pictures of the day.
- Wedding car and decorator: flowers for the car and the exit.
- Rice or petals: check the venue allows them outside.
Our questions to ask your venue and questions to ask your photographer sheets cover both. Browse vendors by city from locations.
Common spellings
Vidaai, vidai, vidaii, bidaai and bidai. "Bidaai" is a common alternative that reflects a different regional pronunciation. Formal programmes may say kanya vidai.
Planning tip. Build fifteen to thirty minutes into the timetable for the farewell. It rarely runs to the minute, and nobody wants to hurry the goodbye.
Questions
In some families the bride throws handfuls of rice or grain back over her head towards her family as she leaves, as a wish for their continued prosperity. Customs vary by region and family, and many families do not include it.
No. The Hindu American Foundation describes the kanya vidai as optional and up to the bride and her family. Many UK couples keep a short farewell at the venue door.
They mark the same moment. Vidaai is the Hindu term, rukhsati the term used by Muslim families. Sikh and Punjabi families often say doli.
Related terms: rukhsati · baraat · haldi · milni
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